From the writing and acting
talent that has already produced one other not-screened-for-critics comedy in
2006, Grandma’s Boy, comes this baseball story. To say that it strikes
out would be trite, yet in keeping with the unoriginal spirit shown here. The
plot is, one day a guy (Rob Schneider) decides to pick up his old mitt and gets
his misfit pals (David Spade and Napoleon Dynamite’s Jon Heder) to
challenge some pre-teen bullies in a tournament. Heder’s character is basically
Napoleon with a lower IQ and a better haircut. Spade is basically himself with
a worse haircut. Schneider is the normal one, as well as the only one who knows
how to play baseball. As for the jokes, here’s a sample. Heder: “What’s
steroids?” Spade: “Something that makes your peepee smaller.” To be fair,
though, The Benchwarmers is more of a visual comedy, and it’s a
nose-picking, bug-eating, face-farting, face-spitting, head-banging,
crotch-smacking, pants-pulling, projectile vomit lover’s dream. I’m awarding
this half a star extra purely on the basis that the ending was mildly
surprising. I never actually laughed. As this movie taught me, it’s not nice to
laugh at a loser.
posted 9/3/13
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