An unscary horror film with poorly filmed death scenes, weak characters, and the promising but badly executed premise of a video game becoming reality.
Here’s a lifeless horror film
about a video game coming to life, just like in the awful Spy Kids 3-D: Game
Over. The idea has potential, and if you want to see that potential
realized, go rent eXistenZ, the badly titled but effective David
Cronenberg film from 1999. Few scenes here are even scary. As for the
characters, at best, you won’t care about them. At worst, they’re annoying,
especially the one played by the only semi-big name in the cast, Frankie Muniz
of Malcolm in the Middle. He’s kind of like Malcolm with a lobotomy,
mumbling silly theories about why dying in the game might be leading them to
die in real life. But even someone with temporal lobes intact would have
trouble making sense of this. Ideally, the video game would have clear rules
that the players could follow to avoid dying. Ideally, the movie would try to
explain why/how some long-dead/foreign crazy woman would be making a comeback in
New Orleans/via a video game. Ideally, no one else will mistakenly see this.
posted 9/5/13
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